Trend Spotter

Mansion Makes Smash

If I had £1 for every time somebody asked me about ‘Mansion Tax’ ………

Surely everyone must be getting bored rigid with all the speculation about what a possible future government might or might not do when it comes to property taxes.

I have been doing dome research of my own – asking local residents what they would like to see done – when it comes to property.  So it is with this research in mind that I put forward the Crayson Election Manifesto.

  • Nosey Neighbours: We promise absolutely no more nosey neighbours.  Their curiosity will not be piqued by anything that you do – no matter how outlandish – up to and including naked frolics in your garden.
  • Noise – what’s that? Neighbours will be completely oblivious to any noise that you generate no matter how loud it might be.  Vice-versa – you can’t hear anything that they get up to at all – including all sorts of banging and of course loud music.
  • Property Taxes – completely abolished including SDLT (Stamp Duty) and all talk of progressive property taxes. Council Tax can stay – as long as they collect the trash every day!
  • Planning Permission – you can do what you want as long as you have planning permission.
  • Basement digs – one floor only unless you have cousins in Australia.
  • Property Prices – when selling, you get exactly what you wanted for your house or flat and there is something for you to buy onwards that seems to be an incredible deal – even possibly a bargain. The people you are buying from seem incredibly happy with the price you are paying – everyone is incredibly happy.
  • Local Shops – offer incredibly fresh and organic food for what appears to be Lidl’esqe prices. A pricing error – or maybe just a wealthy shop owner looking to make a loss to offset against other business surpluses!
  • A magical Newsagent – open 24 hours a day – selling all alcohol at wholesale prices
  • Schools – the best and most highly rated grammar school near enough to be in the catchment area but far away enough to be not seen and not heard.

No sleeping with politicians!  Go to bed with your house – wake up in your house!  What more do we need?